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How To Be a Badass: 10 Lessons Mom Taught Me

My mom taught me everything I know on how to be a badass. And being a badass isn’t easy. That’s why I decided to write this blog How To Be A Badass. From embracing the fear of being different to paddling out on 8 ft days in the ice cold waters of Ireland, I’m sharing everything I’ve learned on how to be a badass from my mom.

What does being a badass even mean? No, it’s not a daredevil. It’s not a “super cool” person.

To me, a badass is a unique, strong, confident, kind, and passionate individual whose intelligence lies more in the ability to think differently than in the ability to think like the rest of the world.

It’s about how even if you’ve been somewhere a dozen times, you can always continue to grow as a person as long you continue to seek adventure. It’s about having a mindset that is curious, seeks challenge, and wants to live their purpose. 

(Please forgive me for using the word badass too many times).

Now the other thing about badasses is that they don’t think they are badassess.

A badass knows that they are a badass by believing in themselves and in their passions, but doesn’t seek external approval of being a badass.

A badass doesn’t care what others think of them so much as they care what they think of themselves.

This isn’t to say a badass is full of themselves. A badass is a modest, kind person always trying to lift others up.

(So considering how many times I just used the word badass, kind of makes me not a badass).

From the second my family decided to sell everything we owned when I was only 14 years old, start traveling full time, and ditch conformity, I’ve been a weirdo. 

I’m a weirdo for being different.

While other girls attended homecoming, I was exploring the French Pyrenees on a trekking adventure.

When most girls would spend their summers going to concerts and parties, I was searching for new climbing routes to lead in Smith Rock, Squamish, and Maple Canyon.

When most girls were studying for finals, I was sitting in a 3rd world village of Bali surfing one of the world’s longest lefts in the world.

Related Blog: Should you go to Bali? A lesson in hardship and appreciation

FOMO haunted me for months when I first became a nomad at 14. For 3 years I was faced with challenges most girls my age rarely have to face—persistence, failure, adaptability.

5 years later I find myself with a whole world of knowledge I’ve gained—both literally and figuratively. Adventuring across the world taught me a lot. 

No matter what you’re trying to learn, you can’t do it on your own. You need a school and a teacher.

The world’s mountains and seas were my school. My badass mom was my teacher. 

Check out my TEDx Talk: Becoming a Warrior

How My Mom Taught Me To Be A Badass

My mom is not “normal”. She’s absolutely insane but she also a complete badass.

Surfing Law Street, Pacific Beach, San Diego
Surfing Law Street in Pacific Beach, San Diego

My mom stared adversity in the face and chose the road traveled because she believed in something more. She was passionate about adventure and chose to take a risk and chase that dream with 5 kids in tow (including me).

So what if she has 5 kids? There are rocks that need to be climbed, seas to be surfed, trails to be mountain biked, and peaks to be hiked to.  

She’s a strong, unique, brave, and passionate individual…AKA badass #dontbejealous 

Though the harsh elements of the ocean and the mountains brought me face to face with challenges, my mom was the one who taught me how to overcome these and ended up teaching me a whole lot about life.

I don’t want to make this sound like an ode to my adventure mama, but to be completely honest my mom is the ultimate badass. My mom taught me everything I know about how to be a badass (though I’m still not sure I fit the description).

It may have taken seeing 25 countries; surfing the powerful waves of Ireland, Scotland, and Spain; and multi pitching exposed faces in Switzerland and also completely failing on easy routes in Smith Rock. 

It may have taken driving for 8 hours straight in a tiny car with 6 other people and setting up our tents in the dark at your destination because that’s the only way to afford to travel in New Zealand.

Related Blog: 10 Reasons People Don’t Full Time Travel With Teenagers

Enduring nights on airport floors for those budget-friendly 4 am flights might have its own charm.

Living in tents and RVs, devoid of electricity, water, or wifi, might have been necessary.

Being compelled to communicate in France without a hint of French was quite the experience.

It may have taken lots of crushing failures.

Climbing those 10,000-foot mountain peaks might have required numerous hikes up steep trails.

It may have taken enduring criticism and haters.

It may have been a complete test of if your dreams are worth the hardship. 

BUT by the end of it all, the hard parts and easy parts, the lessons I learned were not only 100x more valuable than a high school education, but thanks to my radical mom who brought me around the world, it made me (almost) a badass.

So if I were to take this 5-year education and lay it out in a simple way (if only it were this simple) these are the 10 lessons my lifestyle (and my mom) taught me on how to be a badass:

Embracing your differences is one of the scariest things in the world

So without further ado here’s 10 steps on how to be a badass…

1. How To Be A Badass: Own Your Weirdness

At some point in your life, I’m sure you’ve wanted to “fit in.” But by doing so, you prevent your deepest sense of self to shine through.

Everyone is different, but it’s a matter of embracing your weirdness and owning it that makes you a badass.

Related Blog: Sacral Chakra Healing (the Sacral Charka is what allows us to own our weirdness & believe we are worthy.

Knowing who you are, what makes you happy, and your inner value system are great ways to start owning your weirdness. Learn how to Unlock Your Inner Warrior here.

Climbing in Bishop CA
We rough it for these moments

2. How To Be A Badass: Persistence

Persistence isn’t having a hard day and continuing to wake up and live that same life.

On a daily basis, I’m faced with tests to my persistence.

There are so many days I want to give up on my dreams, on my sports, on my lifestyle because the hard times nearly outweigh the epic times.

Persistence is pushing yourself to your physical limit, and often even failing, but waking up the next day and giving 100% effort again.

But every time the doubt arises, I think about why I’ve done each thing as long as I have.

Because I love these things. And when you love something, you should never stop fighting for those things.

As long as you truly love something, persistence will emerge. 

3. How To Be A Badass: Actual Strength and Health

Now while strength can imply mental toughness, I’m talking about the guns💪

Knowing what you love is great, and if you have confidence and own your uniqueness that’s even more rad. But if physical strength or fitness is holding you back from achieving your personal state of badassery, then something’s got to change.

For me, my passion lies in outdoor adventure so physical strength is necessary for me to continue to challenge myself in those passions.

Ignoring your health and being lazy about your fitness is not cool.

Don’t forget to check out our second instagram account @chakrabadass, how the chakras are holding you back from being a badass.

4. How To Be A Badass: Intelligence

A badass does not need to have superhuman intelligence, but a badass does need to have the intelligence to figure shit out.

Badasses value the capacity to think differently and find solutions that others wouldn’t think of.

Badasses use their intelligence not to indulge in schooling to certify to others their level of intelligence but to figure out solutions to their own problems in life.

With these unique problem-solving skills, badasses are highly capable of achieving things they want because they apply a different approach to planning and finding solutions. 

A single failure will teach you more than 1000 successes.

5. How To Be A Badass: Failure 

Failure sucks. I hate failing, but does anyone?  We live in a success and achievement-oriented society where you are raised to believe that winning 1st place makes you better than everyone.

Warning, another cheesy line coming, but the truth is: We learn from our mistakes.

If you’re not failing, you’re not going to grow as a person.

If you always flash climb that route or bouldering problem, you’re probably not challenging yourself on a harder route where you might fail. And if you’re not challenging yourself and testing your comfort zone, then you’re not going to be forced to try a heel hook and add a new skill to your repertoire of knowledge.

And isn’t that really the goal in life? Not to see how many successes you have, but how much you’ve learned through failure.

Surfing in Hanalei Bay

6. How To Be A Badass: Confidence + Modesty

There is a HUGE difference between being conceited and modest. A badass recognizes that even though others oftentimes confuse the two.

Confidence is not simply knowing your strengths, it’s acknowledging your weaknesses too and embracing both.

Badasses also know that you can’t have confidence without self-worth.  And self-worth comes from having passions that fulfill you.

Self-worth roots from knowing what makes you happy and knowing that you don’t need praise from other people to make you happy. Once a badass finds self-worth, they then recognize their flaws which keeps them modest, and their differences and strengths, which makes them confident.

Confident people don’t try to change themselves to fit the mold. Confidence lies in acceptance—acceptance that you are who you are, differences and flaws, and loving yourself but the not thinking you’re better than everyone else.

But remember, confidence isn’t treating others as if they are less amazing than you.

Confidence isn’t something that can be faked. The truth about someone’s confidence is as easy to see as the color of their eyes.

A confident person doesn’t hold themselves as if the are more or less than what they are worth.  By standing straight, shoulders pulled back, head high, you portray that you deserve to fill the absolute right amount of space in the world.

Know who you are, love who you are, own who you are, then stop there. Don’t go further.

Join our Chakra Healing Course and unleash your Power, Passion, & Productivity.

Passions, How To Be a Badass: 10 Lessons Mom Taught Me

7. How To Be A Badass: Passions

Badasses have a reason. A reason to push themselves and endure.

Because when you have passion, nothing that stands in your way is going to stop you from trying to do that passion.

Passions create enjoyment of life and are the single most important part of being a badass. One cannot become a badass without passion.

A passion will always drive you to accomplish more, challenge yourself, and discover the other elements of being your badass self.

8. How To Be A Badass: Independence + Capability 

A badass can take care of themselves. They don’t have to rely on people to do things for them or make decisions for them.

That’s not to say they don’t count on people or trust other people. Badasses are simply capable of being self-sufficient in many situations.

Badasses know that they are the creators of their own destiny and never try to play the victim.

Gab Climbing Clear Creek Canyon Co
Independence and capability: Being able to go conquer that mountain on your own

9. How To Be A Badass: Entitled To Nothing

If you want something you gotta work for it and a badass knows this because a badass cannot become a badass without accepting that they are entitled to nothing. 

A badass knows that everyone has hard parts in their life and good parts in their life and that no one deserves anything in life.

A badass works hard in every aspect of their life and is never lazy because of that. 

 Related Blog: Overcoming an Entitlement Mindset

10. How To Be A Badass: Kindness

A badass is a happy person, someone who has found their “why.” They know that happiness they’ve found feels complete and they want others to be able to feel that way.

Badasses are always trying to lift others up both in daily interactions with strangers and with close friends.

Badasses are so fulfilled in their own state of happiness, they have only kindness to give to the world. They use kindness so others can feel the same level of happiness and discover their own inner badass.

None of us ever truly masters all these elements—we all have places where we struggle— but I do think that the search for these element will make you a more stoked, radical, and happy human being.

While these differences may define you as a weirdo, they’ll also make you a badass.

I want to inspire others that it’s okay be different. It’s okay to not fit the mold. It’s okay to be weird because even though others may judge you, you will be a much happier person.

Do you want to be a confident badass? Do you feel like there’s an invisible wall keeping you from your unlimited potential? Do you want to seize the day?

I want to help you embrace your badassery, not be afraid to challenge yourself, and live your best life. That’s why I’ve created a 5 day course, Unlock Your Inner Warrior Course, made to help you achieve your goals and embody your badass self! Because everyone should be waking up stoked to start the day and go after their dreams.

Thanks for reading, badasses! Let us know if you love this blog in comments below and join my newsletter for more muses, badass tips, and inspiration!

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Thursday 26th of July 2018

Beautiful! I hope that our chosen lifestyle inspires the opportunity for similar badass perspectives in our daughter ❤️


Tuesday 31st of July 2018

Thanks! I'm sure it will :)

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