Stop Waiting On Others (Find Your Own Joy) • Nomads With A Purpose

There was a summer when I came home from my bartending job, sat on my bed, and just stared at my life.

I had been hustling to build my business with no financial progress.
I didn’t really have friends.
I was single and cynical about it.
Even my family relationships were starting to feel heavy instead of joyful.

And the overwhelming feeling wasn’t anger.

It was disappointment.

This wasn’t what I thought my life would look like.

This is lesson six in the things I learned by traveling full-time as a teenager that I believe most of us were never taught — and it completely changed the way I experience relationships, self-worth, and life itself.

Because what I eventually realized is this:

Disappointment is what happens when we’re waiting for others to give us something we haven’t learned to give ourselves.

Disappointment Is Your Early Warning System

We usually think of disappointment as something small.

But I’ve learned that disappointment is actually life’s early signal.

It’s the quiet nudge that comes before bigger emotions like anger, sadness, or resentment take over.

Disappointment is the feeling of not receiving something you hoped for —
whether that’s support, validation, love, inclusion, understanding, or reassurance.

When we ignore those small moments long enough, they harden into deeper pain.

But when we listen to them, they reveal something powerful:

There’s a feeling we’re trying to get from the outside world.

How Travel Quietly Rebuilt My Self-Worth

When my family moved into an RV and began traveling full-time, I didn’t realize it at first — but everything about my sense of worth started to change.

I was suddenly doing things that terrified me.

Climbing exposed ridgelines.
Surfing dark water in foreign countries.
Navigating new places in the middle of the night.
Handling breakdowns on the side of the road.
Towing a trailer across unfamiliar terrain.

Every time I faced something hard and made it through, something shifted.

My confidence wasn’t coming from winning.
Or approval.
Or being liked.

It was coming from proving to myself that I could handle life.

Without realizing it, I had traded external validation for intrinsic self-worth.

I stopped waiting for someone else to tell me I was capable.

I felt it.

When Rejection Still Hurt

But that didn’t mean disappointment disappeared overnight.

Whenever I’d come back into normal social settings as a teenager, I’d try to share about my life — the adventures, the growth, the experiences.

And often… I was ignored.

People preferred talking about gossip or surface-level stuff.

Slowly, the old story crept back in:

People don’t like me.
I’m not good enough.
I don’t belong.

So I pulled away.

For a while, I didn’t even try to have a social life. I just kept pursuing adventure, courage, and purpose.

But at 21, I wanted connection again.

I tried building friendships through climbing — and surprisingly, I felt the same rejection. Only this time it wasn’t about who you were. It was about how well you climbed.

Once again, I was hoping to feel seen, valued, and included — and once again I felt disappointed.

That’s when I finally saw the pattern.

I wasn’t really disappointed in people.

I was disappointed because I was hoping others would give me a feeling of worthiness that I hadn’t fully learned to give myself.

The Thought That Changed Everything

Here’s the biggest breakthrough I had:

Every feeling starts as a thought.

A thought sends a signal through your body — and we experience it as sadness, anger, joy, insecurity, or disappointment.

Most of our thoughts are shaped by childhood programming — the beliefs we formed about how to get love, approval, and belonging.

But we have something incredible as humans:

Metacognition — the ability to observe and change our thoughts.

Which means we can literally create new emotional experiences.

That’s when I understood the antidote to disappointment:

👉 Give yourself what you’re hoping to receive from others.

How I Started Giving It to Myself

At first, this looked like changing the inner dialogue.

When I felt ignored or inadequate, instead of spiraling, I would consciously tell myself:

I am worthy.
I am unique.
I am capable.
I actually love my life.
Someone else’s opinion doesn’t define me.

But it didn’t stop there.

The “Re-Parenting” Practice That Healed Me

Later, during a season where my family had a home base in Montana and life felt isolated and heavy, disappointment resurfaced in a different way.

I was transitioning into adulthood, struggling with business, feeling lost — and craving emotional guidance and reassurance.

I wanted someone to tell me:

You’re okay.
You’re on the right track.
You don’t have to burn yourself out to be worthy.

So I finally asked myself:

How can I give myself the support I’m waiting for someone else to give me?

This is when I began journaling as my “higher self.”

I would write everything I wished I could say to someone else — all the fears, frustrations, and hopes.

Then I’d respond to myself with compassion, reassurance, wisdom, and encouragement.

And surprisingly… the answers came.

Not from anxiety.
From something deeper — intuition, inner wisdom, whatever you want to call it.

This practice changed my life.

Turning Disappointment Into Empowerment (Practical Steps)

Here’s how you can do this too:

1. Name what you’re hoping to feel

Ask yourself:

What am I actually wanting right now?
Validation? Comfort? Love? Support? Fun? Adventure?

2. Give yourself a version of it

Need comfort? Hug yourself, breathe, wrap in a blanket.
Want experiences? Take yourself on solo dates.
Want reassurance? Journal to yourself.
Want adventure? Go do the thing.

3. Shift from neediness to fullness

When you stop waiting for others to fill the void, something incredible happens.

You show up calmer.
More confident.
Less reactive.
More grounded.

And relationships naturally improve.

The Real Lesson

Here’s the truth that changed everything for me:

Disappointment isn’t about what you can’t get from others.
It’s about what you haven’t learned to give yourself yet.

When you become the person you’ve been waiting for:

✨ You stop spiraling
✨ You stop resenting
✨ You stop feeling empty
✨ You start living from wholeness

And from that place — life gets so much easier to navigate.

If this resonated with you, this is part of my Raised on the Road series — lessons I learned traveling full-time as a teenager that completely shaped who I am today.

There’s so much more coming.

And if you’ve been feeling disappointed lately, ask yourself:

What am I hoping someone else will give me — and how can I give it to myself today?

Click here to continue my Raised on the Road series.